Sunday, November 1, 2026

PSW Madhouse Episode 6 - The Learning Tree

Compound

Chloe Davis stands in a dedicated interview zone within the compound. 

Davis: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the "Outlaw" Jessie Moore. 

The towering and heavyset Salt Laker slowly walks into view, black hat and red bandana on, hands in pockets, to loud cheers and boos.

Davis: Now, Jessie-

Moore: Jessie? Do ah know ya? Ahr we fuh-amiliar? We friends? Who thuh blazes you callin' Jessie?!

Davis (flinches): S-Sorry, Miss Moore-

Moore: Miss? Ah've bee-yn married 11 yars.  Ah done thought ya'd know, bein' a journalist an all, but ah guess thay jus' huhre any ole purty face awff thuh street!

Some in the crowd laugh.

Davis (closes eyes and shakes): R-Right! Mrs Moore-

Moore (slowly leans in, her beady lime green eyes boring into the purple-haired interviewer): Moo-wre is maah maiden nuh-ame. 

Crowd: OOOOOOOOHHH!!!!

Moore: What exactly you implyin' whe-yn ya cahwl me "Mrs" Moore?

Davis (shaking and crying): I... I-I-I-I...

Moore: ... (straightens) Will ya lighten uhp? Ah was jus' messin' with ya.

A.B.: That's her idea of a joke?

Shamoon: Not funny!

Dominga: I thought it was pretty funny.

A.B.: Of course you did.

Davis lets out a really, really deep sigh.

Moore (shaking): Look at ya.  Shakin' an sighin' an crying, fixinn-ta wet yourself awn camera.

Davis: I'm sorry, you're just-

Moore (leans in again): What? Ah'm what?

Davis (quiet): ... Really scary.

Moore raises her hand, and Davis flinches again, only for the Outlaw to pat her on the head.

Moore: It's daisy t' be afeared. Means ya're alive an that yo-wr brain works. (pulls hand back) Now git awn with it.

Davis (deep breath): Of course. Now, um...

Moore: Jessie.

Davis: Jessie, tonight, you're set to go one-on-one with the No. 1 draft pick, Sarah Esposito, to determine who will be the No. 1 contender for the Jewell's Championship held by your historic rival, Empress Ngozi, at the Valentine's Brawl. What are your thoughts heading into this match?

Moore: Maah thoughts ahr thuh same as last week.  Esposito ain't nothin' mo-wr than thuh GM's can-crushin' pet project, an Ah'm gonna expohs her tonaahyt.

Davis: You sound very confident.

Moore: Awf course, ahm.  Ah've bee-yn all ovher this mudball, an ah've fought a dozen brolic bitches jus' like her. Where ahr thay now? Ah couldn't tell ya, but ah'm still hair, an 9 out awf 10 awf 'em ain't.

Davis: I can see your perspective, but... this isn't going to be the first time you lock up with Sarah Esposito. The first time being in Episode 1, the 6-Woman Tag, where she...

Moore (miming): "Tossed maah fuh-at ass from that cornerr-ta that theyer corner." 

A.B.: Correct.

Davis nods.

Moore: Those theyer were her words, give or take, right? An she's raahyt. She done do that, an it done threw me for a loop, but last week, Ah done heard her speak, an Ah done looked her in thuh eyes.  Ah done saw what was goin' awn uhp hair (taps temple), an it's culair as crystal that she dudn 'ave what it takes t' gitty-up all thuh way. 

Dominga: Correct!

Moore (shrugs): Maybe one day. Maybe one day, she will be that rare 1 out awf 10, but that ain't todee. Today, she's gawt a date with thuh learnin' tree, an Ah gawt a date with destiny. (turns away)

Davis: W-Wait, what about Queen Cobra and Shay Maharaj?

The crowd boos the two names.

Moore: What about 'em?

Davis: Well, they've been your allies pretty much since night 1 of this show. That is, before you violently severed that connection last week, before you went out to challenge Ngozi and the subsequent confrontation with Sarah Esposito that led to tonight's match. Aren't you worried about potential interference or retaliation?

Shamoon: That's a good question.

Moore: Ifin' thuh Snay-uk an thuh Scrub know what's daisy for 'em, thay will stay fuh-ar away from me an maah business. An ya know what, Ah thihnk ah maahyt may-uk an example awf Esposito, jus' t' illustrayte maah point.

Dominga: That's a great answer.

Moore: Ahr we done hair... Chloe?

Davis: Y-Yes. Thank-

Moore (leans in): The-yn hooaah am ah still seein' ya?

Davis: Uh... I-I'm sorry, are you j-joking again or-

Moore pulls out a revolver. Davis screams, drops the mic and runs off. 

Shamoon: SHE'S GOT A GUN!!!

Moore pulls the trigger and out pops a flag with the word "BANG" written in bold. Again, some in the crowd laugh. The laughter ceases when she looks into the camera. 

The feed ends.

Show Grounds

A.B.: Utterly psychotic, reprehensible, hillbilly dog. 

Dominga: Wow, tell us how you really feel.

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