Vito Montani is standing by a corner, facing away from the stage and gripping the ropes tightly.
SDS: And so we have our new main event for tonight. I just want to apologise to everyone for the atrocious, unprofessional conduct of our Champion. I would say the same thing for the challenger, but his frustration is understandable. The phrase "Card is subject to change" typically refers to factors beyond our control, acts of God, if you will. It has nothing to do with THAT!
DS: I still can't believe he did it. He really walked out...
SDS: It's disgusting, isn't it?
DS: What're you talking about? It was awesome! Did you see the look on Campbell's face? I've seen fresh, ripe tomatoes more pale.
SDS: So you're condoning that?
DS: I'm not condoning nothing. Don't put words in my mouth!
SDS: You just called it awesome!
DS: English is my second language. I just didn't have the right words! Look, man, all I'm saying is... ter culhões. The balls, man. The balls.
A virtuosic guitar accompanied by heavy rock riffs plays. The two big screens show a honey badger going about its day: burrowing, climbing, looking cute, biting the balls of lions. The man himself briskly walks out, looking small and rabid.
David Bekker: On the way to the ring, from Hoedspruit, Limpopo, South Africa, standing 168 centimetres...
Montani's head snaps up in shock. He turns around to see his new opponent.
David: ... and weighing in at 104 kilos, the Honey Badger.
The Badger rolls into the ring and immediately tries to lunge at Montani. "Big Joe" Wilson has to push him all the way back. The Italian just looks at him in complete and utter bewilderment.
SDS (shakes): If you want to talk about "balls", the set that this man has to step in as a replacement for our World Dominion Champion, Paul Grizzly-
DS: NO ONE could replace Grizzly.
SDS: I wish someone would. But look at this. Badger trying to get right in Montani's face. Trying to start this match early. Montani, 2 metres, over 120 kilos, and the South African with no fear. He wants this! He wants this bad! And Wilson just calls for the bell. Let's go!
Badger charges with reckless abandon.
SDS: Big boot by Montani! The Badger is down and- Wait, what is he doing?
DS: Go for the cover, idiota!
SDS: Montani's yelling at the referee.
Montani (backing Wilson into the ropes): ...s dis a joke? Is dis some kinda joke?!
Wilson: He's your opponent. What do you want me to tell you?
Montani: I'm supposed ta be fightin' Grizzly!
SDS: Oh my God, Badger's up...
Wilson: He's gone, focus on the match!
Montani: Dis ain't no damn match!
SDS: Badger's on all fours! Montani needs to turn around.
DS: No, he doesn't.
Wilson: Back up, kid! I'm warning you.
Montani: Oh, you're givin' me the warnin'? I oughta-
SDS: Badger taking out Montani at the knee! And now with a DDT! Cover and Montani kicks out with authority!
DS: Sent Badger flying! Didn't even get a one- He's on him again! He's clawing! He's clawing Montani's face! Look at those nails- HE'S BITING HIM! HE'S BITING MONTANI'S FACE, DARRYL!
SDS: Wilson pulling Badger off. Giving him words. I asked before if he was insane- Basement dropkick! Montani was trying to stand up and Badger dropkicked him in the face and now he's going after the knee! He's dropping elbow after elbow after elbow after elbow after elbow! And now he's just punching it! The Honey Badger, a predator smelling blood! And now a knee bar! Submission hold applied, but Montani gets to the rope, forcing the break!
DS: Man, I remember this Badger guy from the Super Fight. Where'd they find him?
SDS: He's another holdover from our GM's old company, PPW, Passion Project Wrestling.
DS: He looks a little bigger, no?
SDS: About 5 kilos of muscle since we last saw him. He's a little too big for the Thunderweights now. Montani to the outside, trying to gather himself.
DS: He's limping, Darryl. He's already limping. Badger went hard for that knee.
Badger goes outside as well, only to the adjacent area. He measures Montani and sprints, jumps on the steps and leaps into the air.
SDS: MONTANI WITH A HAYMAKER! A knockout shot! A knockout shot to the flying Honey Badger! A right hand from a very big, very strong, very angry man who has trained in boxing since he was 10 years old!
Montani picks Badger up and throws him back in the ring, the effort makes his knee hurt.
DS: BADGER'S UP!
SDS: What?! HOW?!
Badger runs the ropes dives headfirst between the middle and bottom rope, headbutting Montani in the face and knocking him over. He gets up immediately after, throwing his head side to side and throwing spit everywhere.
SDS: BADGER WITH A DOLPHIN DIVE TO MONTANI! HOW ON EARTH IS HE MOVING?! MONTANI KNOCKED HIS LIGHTS OUT! Was he playing possum? Did he roll with it in mid-air?
DS: Nah, Stroligo, that was sniper rifle CLEAN! Fist to the jaw, he was out!
SDS: And he's stomping a mudhole on Montani. Referee counting. Badger needs to get back in the ring-And he breaks the count to continue the assualt on that knee, keeping the big man grounded. How impressive has the Honey Badger been thus far? I still can't believe he got up from that right hand.
DS: He was dead and then he woke up, Darryl.
Badger grabs Montani in a front facelock and tries to drag him towards the ring. Montani lifts him up and drives him spine-first into the apron.
SDS: On the hardest part of the ring!
DS: The hardest part of the ring is the post, you cornball.
SDS: Montani with Badger back in the ring. He needs to- BADGER'S BACK UP AND TAKES OUT THE KNEE AGAIN! THIS MAN DOES NOT FEEL PAIN! HE IS DETERMINED TO INFLICT IT!
Montani shoves Badger halfway across the wing, but the smaller man rolls backwards and rushes into an uppercut.
SDS: Montani going for the pin. Badger kicks out, I don't understand how he's doing it. How he's taking these hard shots from Montani- AND A HE JUST RAKED THE EYES! Badger once again clawing the eyes of Montani.
Montani gets up, covering his eyes and groaning. Badger pushes him into the corner punching him several times in the gut, but going after knee again.
DS: He has been on that knee.
SDS: It's a perfect strategy. So much of Vito's offense requires vertical base. Punching power requires your full body, legs included. It might be why those punches aren't keeping him down. That signature Payday Lariat needs a running start too. The 'Ffangul requires a lift, you need your legs for that.
Montani shoves Badger again and tries to get after him. Badger dropkicks him in the knee again.
SDS: We were worried for Badger's safety given the explosive mood Montani was in after Paul Grizzly walked out, but it seems his obsession has exposed him to this attack. You have to think, if Badger can score the win here, whatever the future of the Dominion Championship may be, Badger's name will be in the hat.
DS: You talked about his balls. What his brain? I remember when I was coming up, there was a rule. You don't go home until the main event is over.
SDS: What a punch to the gut by Montani! And now he's got Badger in the corner, laying into him. He's treating him like a miniature heavy bag!
Montani (bends over): STAY DOWN, YA LITTLE FREAK!
*SMACK*
DS: He slapped him!
SDS: A defiant Badger! Another gut punch by Montani and now a biel toss! Badger's up again, going for the knee, but Montani was ready!
DS: Punched him in the back of the head, that's a dirty move... I like it.
SDS: Cover here and another kick out. I remember those same rules, Diogo. These days most companies, ours included, are far more lenient about that sort of thing and while it has its benefits, it has its drawbacks too.
DS: This man, Badger, he was not scheduled to wrestle tonight. His name was not on the card. Paul Grizzly takes his ball, and his title, and goes home. BOOM, there's the Badger! He's dressed and he's ready. If you want to be in the main event, you have to be WATCHING the main event.
SDS: Truer words, partner, but now it's Vito Montani with the advantage. Mounting Badger bringing that big, black-gloved hand down on his face and Badger's smiling! He's laughing! He's begging for more and Montani is obliging! Hammer blow after hammer blow!
DS: He's going to cave his skull in!
Wilson tries to pull Montani off and gets shoved for his trouble. That's it.
SDS: Wilson is calling for the bell. The match is over, but Montani's not stopping! He came for revenge! He came for retribution, and he was denied!
David Bekker: Ladies and gentlemen, Head Referee Joe Wilson has called a stop to this contest. Your winner as a result of a disqualification... the Honey Badger!
Montani finally stops.
DS: What? DQ for what?
SDS: Montani shoved the referee.
DS: He didn't DQ Badger for all the clawing and eye raking. Not that he should have!
SDS: Montani had already been given several warnings already.
Montani stands up, his right hand stained with blood, staring daggers at the zebra.
Wilson: I warned you, kid.
SDS: MONTANI KNOCKED OUT WILSON! MONTANI KNOCKED OUT OUR HEAD REFEREE JOE WILSON! THAT IS GOING TO COST HIM A LOT OF MONEY!
DS: I don't think he cares- B-Badger's sitting up! Badger's still moving, he's trying to sit up and he's still laughing!
SDS: What is wrong with him?!
Montani stomps Badger back down and then limps out of the ring to get a metal folding chair from the timekeeper's area.
Montani: You wanna laugh, huh? You wanna laugh?
SDS: Oh no. Vito, stop! Don't do anything you're going to regret!
DS: Badger is still laughing! He's still moving! He's crawling! What is guy made of?!
Montani (holding chair with both hands): You wanna be a big man? You can take da big man's asswhuppin'.
SDS: Montani with a chair to the back! Again and again and again! FOR GOD'S SAKE, BADGER, STOP MOVING! Thank God, security on their way.
DS: Thank God for what? We just saw how useless they-
SDS: OH MY GOD! MY GOD! Steele nearly got his skull split! Security Chief Brendan Steele got his brain scramble by that chair and now Montani is fighting half a dozen men.
DS: He's out of control!
Dr. Sharma and her team rush to ringside and roll/drag Badger out of the ring while Montani is occupied, dropping security guards left and right. The South African has to be sedated on the spot to stop him from going back in there.
SDS: THIS IS WHAT I WAS TALKING ABOUT! THERE ARE TOO MANY BULLS ON THIS ROSTER WITH THEIR BLOOD RUNNING HOT AND NOW ONE OF THEM HAS EXPLODED HERE!
DS: That's no bull, Darryl! That's a wild Italian stallion and he will NOT be tamed!
SDS: Suddenly, you're his biggest fan!
Montani is the now the only one left standing in the ring. He points at Bekker on the outside and orders him to get in here. The annoncer obeys and gets his microphone snatched out of his hands.
Montani: Gimme dat! (looks at camera man and points) Yo, get ovah here!
The cameraman hesitantly gets closer.
Montani (pointing at himself): Ayy, lookit me! LOOK ME IN MY FUCKIN' EYES!
The veins in his forehead and neck bulge and protrude as he speaks his final two words of the night: OPEN... SEASON!
He throws down the microphone and leaves, limping up the ramp with the crowd firmly behind him.
DS: What does that mean?
SDS: What do you think? If Grizzly won't come to him, he's going to Grizzly! My goodness, look at this carnage and it's only our first episode. Can you imagine what's going to happen next week?
DS: I don't need to. I'll be right here in the FRIDAY NIGHT FIGHT PIT!
Vito limps onto the stage and disappears behind the curtain as the show comes to a close.
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bLast Feed
@RingGeneral_AI 🚨 ANALYSIS: 🚨 Did anyone else see that right hand from Montani? 🥊 That was a 121kg professional boxer landing clean on the button. The Honey Badger was unconscious for 0.5 seconds and then just... woke up? Human beings don't do that. What is in the water in Limpopo?? 🇿🇦 #CombatScience #PSW
- @SaltySankaFan > 🔂 Quote-bLast: "Dead and then he woke up." This is exactly why the Psycho Style is the only thing worth watching in 2031. Badger is a glitch in the simulation. 😵💫
@Official_VitoM1 OPEN SEASON. 🤫🤚 #Streetwise #Newark #HuntingSeason
- @GrizzlyBear4Life @Official_VitoM1 You couldn't even finish a "short, stocky" guy without getting DQ'd. Good luck finding Paul in the wilderness, kid. You're out of your league.
- @VitoStandard @GrizzlyBear4Life He knocked out the Head Ref and the Chief of Security. Vito isn't "wrestling" anymore. He's a menace. 😤
@Coach_Kev_Combat Vito's knee is shredded. You can see the structural instability when he limped up the ramp. 🦵📉 The Honey Badger might have lost the "match" (lol DQ), but he just shortened Vito's career by five years. That knee bar was deep. Campbell’s "Bulls" are literally destroying each other. #InjuryReport #PSWAnalysis
@PsychoSkeptic Unpopular opinion: Campbell staged the Grizzly walkout as an excuse to build up to whatever the next big show is 🍵 But he didn't count on Montani attacking the staff. Steele looked like his soul left his body when that chair hit 🤕 #JusticeForSteele #FightPitChaos
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