PSW Madhouse Episode 2 - Queen Cobra vs Empress Ngozi

The Queen and the Empress circle each other, the latter occasionally giving side-eyes to the stage. Jessie Moore remains in her seat, craning her neck a little to see past the guards.

Shamoon: Queen Cobra has the clear psychological advantage going into this match, courtesy of Shay Maharaj. I hate it, but-

Dominga: But it's brilliant! They trapped her. Trapped her with her own pride, with respect.

A.B.: Trapped her, how? Ngozi has already beaten this... creature. 

Dominga: Barely. She BARELY beat her, and that arm is proof.

A.B.: Then she needs to end this quickly.

PSW Madhouse Episode 2 - Checkmate

Queen Cobra waits in the ring on all fours, her feet set wide apart, her chest and chin touching the mat.

Shamoon: I don't like that look on her face.

Dominga: Oh, relax! She's probably just excited to get another go at the Empress.

A.B.: Dominga, she's leering.

Dominga: People express excitement in different ways, Alf! Don't judge.

Shamoon: I'm telling you guys, she's up to something. I can feel it in my gut.

Dominga: It's probably gas. Maybe you should leave... and never come back.

A.B.: Whatever it is, it won't amount to anything.

PSW Madhouse Episode 2 - United Front

A.B.: Ladies and gentlemen, before we get started with our main event, I have just received word of a situation in the Trainer's Room caught by one of our drones.

Shamoon: The O.R.D.R.L.I.s!

A.B.: I am not calling them that. Roll the footage, please.

The titantron shows the trainer's room and the toll from the night's events: Hotaru Ishikawa still getting splinters pulled out of his bruised back while holding ice to his head, and Luisa Festa being drug-tested, again, behind a curtain.

Dominga: Now's as good a time as any to say, "Kids, don't try this at home."

PSW Madhouse Episode 2 - The Long, Long Grass

Backstage

Chloe Davis: A brutal, terrifying display from the Madness, who are already looking like the dominant group here in the MadHOUSE, and maybe one day, all of PSW. I'm here with someone who was once primed to be the most dominant Woman in PSW, the former and first-ever Jewell's Champion, Queen Cobra.

The tall and wiry Queen saunters in to loud boos, but her amber serpentine eyes stare directly into Davis's soul.

Davis: ... Now-

Cobra: "Onssse primed"... What exssactly doesss that mean?

Davis: Well, with all due respect, after pinning Ngozi to become the inaugural Champion at the Saturday Night Super Fight, you ended up losing the Jewell TO the Empress at Ascension a month later. 

Cobra's eyes narrow.

PSW Madhouse Episode 2 - Track Queens vs JabbarTV vs The Madness

Briar Lane: The following is a Triple Threat Tornado Tag Team Match, and it is scheduled for one fall!

Crowd: ONE FALL!

Pillars of smoke rise on the stage. Elsa and Eeva, two twin ponytailed ladies, speed out of the sliding doors with their helmets, respective red and purple plaid skirts and roller skates. They slide to a stop at the base of the ramp before splitting off to ride around the ring.

Briar Lane: Introducing first, at a combined weight of 264 pounds, Elsa and Eeva, the TRACK QUEENS!

Dominga: I'll say it again, give these two all the credit and, I guess, Leota too. They surprised me with their roller skate wrestling, but I hope they understand they're in there with more than Tubers this time. A LOT more.

A.B.: I imagine they are fully aware. They have to be.

Elsa and Eeva meet at the base of the ramp once again and slide into the ring. They each climb the ropes and throw up the sign of the horns, before hopping down and throwing off their helmets and plaid skirts.

Dominga: Settle down, Aazif.

Shamoon: I didn't even say anything!

Dominga: That's what I'm worried about.

PSW Madhouse Episode 2 - Cold Reception, Warm Welcome

The cameraman finds himself in a dark room with candles everywhere. He steps around them, carefully, taking deep breaths as he approaches a very tall chair. He walks around, but finds no one sitting there. 

 The candles slowly go out, darkening the room further and further until he can see nothing. He looks around, trying to leave, but not knowing which way is out, frost forming with every heavy breath, soft crunching noises with every step, until his feet become rooted to the floor.

Then the light returns, but it is not the same. It is blue, like the ice. The silhouette of the Thunderweight Champion, El Demonio de las Heladas, passes by. The light follows him, for his eyes are the source, though he does not look at the cameraman, only at his belt, its golden lightning patterns shining almost as brightly.

Heladas: They say that time waits for no man, but I am no man. And yet, I grow tired of waiting.

PSW Madhouse Episode 2 - Luisa Festa vs "Emperor" Talon w/ "Socialite" Seraphina Dubois

The stage is lit with a neon purple colour. The sliding doors open, and Festa, still a little bandaged up, rolls forward into a cross-legged sitting position. The lights change to red. She lifts herself to a knee and backflips, landing in a superhero pose. A strobe effect of green, yellow, white, and red is created. 

Shamoon: She's looking a lot better.

Briar Lane: On the way to the ring, from Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, standing 5 feet 6 and weighing in at 129 pounds, LUISA FESTA!

She gets up and skips to the ring with a spaced-out look on her face. holding out her arms and waving them like a tubeman. The crowd cheers her on. 

Dominga: She's on something. I just know it.

A.B.: She was just tested. They couldn't find anything.

Dominga: Look at her eyes! Last week, they were pink. This week, they're blue. She's Afro-Brazilian. That doesn't make any sense.

Shamoon: Ever hear of contact lenses?

Dominga: I worked with contacts for years. Those irises are real! 

PSW Madhouse Episode 2 - Maya Lethbridge w/Kalavina Leota vs Athiambo

A rocking melody plays. A young Caucasian woman with short brown hair with bangs, wearing blue and red gear, jogs out of the sliding doors on the stage. She is followed closely by an older, stern-looking Samoan woman with big curly hair and a tracksuit. The crowd pops mildly, more so for the older woman.

Briar Lane: Accompanied to the ring by Kalavina Leota, from Calgary, Alberta, Canada, standing 5 feet 6 and weighing in at 140 pounds, Maya Lethbridge!

A.B.: Maya Lethbridge, the young technician with 8 years in the game. We last saw her and her mentor, Kalavina Leota, the "Mother Hen of Holds" at Saturday Night Super Fight in November. They stepped inside the 16-person Cage Match to crown the first-ever PSW Tag Team Champions, a match that was won by Team Wallace over on the Fight Pit.

Lethbridge high-fives and fistbumps some fans. Leota whispers something in her ear, and she nods before rolling into the ring and slapping herself to get focused.

Dominga: Oh, so Leota trains actual wrestlers, too? 

A.B.: What's that supposed to mean?

PSW Madhouse Episode 2 - Champion's Pride

Ishikawa is getting helped to the back.

Backstage

Chloe Davis stands in front of a large TV monitor, mic in hand and a smile on her face.

Davis: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the Bearer of the Jewell, EMPRESS NGOZI!

The crowd explodes in raucous applause before the Empress even appears on screen. When she does, clad in a black robe and signature orange visor with the Jewell's Championship over her left shoulder, they get even louder.

Davis: Empress, thank you for your time. How's the arm?

Ngozi raises her right arm and bends it, slowly: It's much better, Chloe, though not quite 100%. Of course, if I were 100%, I'd be the best wrestler in the world. (pauses, looks up) Oh, wait! (looks at Chloe with a smile, lowers arm) I am.

PSW Madhouse Episode 2 - Roger Evans (c) vs Hotaru Ishikawa

Various crewmen come down to the ring, setting down or setting up tables all around the ring. The two combatants, now both no longer wearing their respective shirts and accessories, take their corners.

 A.B.: If you’re just joining us, Hotaru Ishikawa has challenged the inaugural Crimson King, Roger Evans, to a tables match!

Dominga: A horrible mistake will be corrected tonight. The Lord truly works in mysterious ways.  

 A.B.: As you can see, the ring is now surrounded by tables. The danger is ever-present. 

Shamoon: You think that stuff Ishikawa said was true? About getting replaced in the Crimson Cage fatal-4-way at Ascension?

A.B.: I'm sure he'd love to believe that. 

Dominga: He wouldn't have said it if it wasn't true. In fact, I have it on good authority that he was in the running before this idiot got handed the spot. (sighs) Will this beautiful sport ever be free of backstage politics and nepotism?

Shamoon: Tell me YOU aren't complaining about nepotism?

PSW Madhouse Episode 2 - The Dude & the D-bag

A.B.: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the second episode of Psycho Style Wrestling's Monday Night Madhouse! We come to you live from the Sunrays Stadium in the beautiful city of Lambanog! I'm Alf Balducci, the fiery Dominga Alvarez to my right, the insightful Aazif Shamoon to my left. Guys, I am excited!

Dominga: The one thing that would make this night better would be if I didn’t have to see that fedora-wearing cabrón at the start of the show. 

 A.B.: Amen to that. 

 Shamoon: Oh, come on. Just give him a chance. 

 A.B.: He was given one last week and he disrespected the business with his presence. 

PSW Madhouse Episode 2 - Quid Pro Quo

 

- 6 January 2031.

Backstage 1 hour and 30 minutes before the show starts. 

Sarah Esposito is seated on a chair, on the phone, due to not having a match. She is wearing jeans and a jacket. 

Esposito: It was that bad? Wow, my dad didn't talk to me for days, but… Uh-huh, look, they'll come around, I'm sure of- (Door opens) I’ll have to call you back. (Puts phone in pocket and gets up quickly)

Empress Ngozi (raises hands): Easy! I come in peace. 

PSW Fight Pit Episode 1 - *The Honey Badger vs Vito Montani

Previous Segment

Vito Montani is standing by a corner, facing away from the stage and gripping the ropes tightly.

SDS: And so we have our new main event for tonight. I just want to apologise to everyone for the atrocious, unprofessional conduct of our Champion. I would say the same thing for the challenger, but his frustration is understandable. The phrase "Card is subject to change" typically refers to factors beyond our control, acts of God, if you will. It has nothing to do with THAT!

DS: I still can't believe he did it. He really walked out...

SDS: It's disgusting, isn't it?

DS: What're you talking about? It was awesome! Did you see the look on Campbell's face? I've seen fresh, ripe tomatoes more pale.

SDS: So you're condoning that?

DS: I'm not condoning nothing. Don't put words in my mouth!

SDS: You just called it awesome!

PSW Fight Pit Episode 1 - Paul Grizzly (c) vs Vito Montani

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David Bekker: Ladies and gentlemen, this is your main event of the evening! And it is scheduled for one fall.

Crowd: ONE FALL!

David Bekker: And it is for the Psycho Style Wrestling World Dominion Championship!

An intense hip hop track plays over the speakers, and the crowd pops. Montani comes out, shirtless as always, with a beanie on his head, a crucifix around his neck and purpose in his steps. 

David Bekker: Introducing the challenger! Representing the Streetwise Krew, from Newark, New Jersey in the USA, standing 2 metres tall and weighing in at 121 kilos, VITO MONTANI!

PSW Fight Pit Episode 1 - Triple Tectonic Trouble

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A high-energy, high-spirited violin and beat track plays and the crowd pops loudly. A very small, skinny man power walks down the ramp with a smile. He is cald in orange from his baseball cap to his shirt to his trunks and boots. 

DS: Uh, security? I think a fan snuck over the barricade.

SDS: That's no fan, Darryl. 

David Bekker: Making his way to the ring, from Alice Springs, Australia, standing 170 centimetres and weighing in at 73 kilos, Job R. Smith!

PSW Fight Pit Episode 1 - The Kraal

Previous Segment

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Backstage

The crowd loudly cheers as tall, shredded, tanned Italian in denim jeans with one hand covered by a black fingerless glove and the other in white wrappings. Both hands are throwing jabs, hooks, crosses and uppercuts.

SDS: And there he is! Vito Montani. He challenges Paul Grizzly in an Ascension rematch for the World Dominion Championship next, and Diogo just look at the speed of those hands. If he were fighting anyone else, I'd be worried-

DS: But he's not, Darryl! He's fighting Paul Grizzly, who already tore his ass up on Sunday and tonight, he finishes the job!

Cyclone (o.s): Vito.

PSW Fight Pit Episode 1 - Danys Vités vs El Cirujano

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SDS: It is now time for some Thunderweight action!

David Bekker: The following contest is scheduled for one fall!

Crowd: One fall!

A deep rumbling futuristic track plays. The two big screens on the stage each show a speed-o-meter, which transitions into a vortex. A flash of light and the first-person camera rushes through a subway, exits onto a busy street at even greater speeds. 

An explosion and a blurry streak of blue, black and orange rushes down the ramp and circles the ring 5 times, before stopping at the base of the ramp. Vités runs forward and slides feet-first into the ring. 

He raises a hand in the air, his eyes glowing amber behind his black mask and drops it. A trail of blue pyro runs comes down the ramp mimicking his previous path. The Tequila crowd loses it, just like the Sambuca crowd at Ascension.

PSW Fight Pit Episode 1 - Backin' Blood

We cut to an area in the back where GM Jeffrey Campbell, clad in a purple dress shirt with rolled-up sleeves and his signature curve-rimmed hat, is standing by a large monitor. Next to him is Fight Pit Producer, Palesa Jeyi, with her big afro and brightly-coloured pantsuit. The crowd pops loudly when they see him.

Jeyi: Hectic...

Campbell: Yeah, that's Tình Nhân, fair dinkum. If she were still in her prime, Nalah would've nabbed her. We're bloody lucky, eh?

Jeyi: Tell that to Hendrix.

Campbell (shrugs): Wrong place, wrong time. He'll be right. (looks at her, while pointing at the monitor) And speakin' of, who in the blue hell gave the thumbs up to that absolute shocker of a tune they rocked up to?

Jeyi (shakes her head while holding up her hands): That was NOT the song they submitted. I don't know what that was.

Campbell: Yeah, well, ya better get onto fixin' it, pronto, before Sanka kicks me off the telly or the U.N. slaps us with sanctions for terrorism.

PSW Fight Pit Episode 1 - Mother's Word is Law

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Tình Nhân remains still for a moment. You can hear a pin drop. Mộng Dữ stands completely still as though he were made of stone and just as lifeless, with his eyes completely blacked out. Hổn Loạn breathes heavily, swaying from side to side, clawing at his own arm, ready to explode.

Tình Nhân: Psycho... Style... I remember when those words first graced my ears. I remember when I was baptised and converted. And I remember, from a distance, watching it die...

She looks down at the mat for a moment.

Tình Nhân: Imagine my shock when it found new life and... (raises her head) when it called out to me.

PSW Fight Pit Episode 1 - Tom & Dick vs Battalion Bros

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The actual match is well underway. Tom, no longer wearing his top hat and shades, stomps on El Soldado in the corner. Dick is on the apron, while Harry stands on the outside yelling insults with tissues in his bloody nose. Referee Dan Masters is issuing warnings and starting the five-count.

SDS: Presley needs to be careful here. Tag. In comes-

DS: BIG DICK!

SDS: Really?

DS: It was right there. Don't tell me not to take it.

PSW Fight Pit Episode 1 - Military Meets Music

 Pyro shoots up from the stage, screeching loudly before falling back down and exploding, followed by a grungy rock track playing. Two men draped in camo walk out. A well-built Caucasian with a bandana and a ginger beard, and a shorter, leaner, brown-skinned luchador with a camo mask and blonde mohawk.

They walk down together, slapping hands with fans on either side.

SDS: On the topic of tag teams...

David Bekker: The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall! Making their way to the ring, at a combined weight of 196 kilos, Major Mallory, El Soldado, the Battalion Bros!

DS: You know, Darryl. I had brothers, cousins and uncles in the Brazilian Armed Forces, I'm talking Navy, Army, Air Force, Police, Firefighters, everything. I cannot stand stolen valour.

SDS: Stolen valour? Devin Mallory was a Major in the United States Marine Corps. His credentials are legitimate.

DS: I'm not talking about Mallory! I'm talking about that bobagem next to him. "El Soldado"? "The Soldier"? Seriously?

SDS: He has credentials, too!

PSW Fight Pit Episode 1 - Title Talk

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DS: Darryl, I can't get over that Cyclone kid. I thought he was done, and he just ran through Kruscher at the end and picked him up. That was superhuman!

SDS: Indeed it was, partner. There is no doubt in my mind that he will be challenging for the World Dominion title in the very near future, whether it's Paul Grizzly or Vito Montani.

Santos shakes his head at the mention of Montani.

SDS: Now, we've already been feeling the fallout of the end of Ascension, but two big title changes took place earlier in the show.

DS: That's right! We witnessed perfection when Dennis Zázrak took Tecton, even after his pathetic loser of an ex-partner, Talon, jumped him!

SDS: We'll hear from the new Tectonic Champion later tonight, just like we'll hear from the new Tag Team Champions, Pandemonium, very shortly. And Diogo, you and I, we're no strangers to tag team gold. Although I will admit you're more experienced in that department than me.

DS (smirks and nods, while holding up his fingers): 7 times, baby!

SDS: Have you ever been in or seen as one-sided a bout as we saw on Sunday in that tag team ladder match?

PSW Fight Pit Episode 1 - Johnny Cyclone vs Kruscher

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Lightning strikes the stage before a high-energy 130 BPM rock track blasts through the speakers. 

DS: AAAAAH! What the hell?!

The two big screens display an endless looping clip of a tornado. Johnny Cyclone walks, rolling his shoulders and cracking his neck while clenching his white-gloved fists. 

David Bekker: The following contest is scheduled for one fall!

Crowd: One fall!

Cyclone starts bouncing on the balls of his feet, his freeform dreadlocks shaking every which way.

David Bekker: Introducing first, from Montgomery, Alabama, in the United States of America, standing 2 metres tall and weighing in at 115 kilos, JOHNNY CYCLONE!

Cyclone leaps into the air and comes crashing down, summoning a huge explosion of pyro. He marches down to the ring, slapping some hands with the fans.

PSW Fight Pit Episode 1 - Hero's Welcome

Next Segment 

- 3 January 2031

The capacity crowd is rabid, held back by a chain-link barricade in the fog-filled arena. A ramp leads down from a stage with two big screens displaying the letters P S W in red, purple and blue, respectively, to the ring. The ring is completely white save for the steel-grey ropes and the words "FIGHT PIT" splattered on the apron in blue.

SDS: HAPPY NEW YEAR! Welcome everybody to the first episode of Psycho Style Wrestling's Friday Night Fight Pit. "Striking" Darryl Stroligo here with the "Carnival King" Diogo Santos, and we are LIVE from the Tenamaxtli Stadium in the town of Tequila!

DS: "Tequila", my ASS, Darryl! Have you tasted the stuff they got here? It's like drinking horse piss, companheiro. They should change the name!

SDS: How do you know what that tastes like?

DS: NO COMMENT!